Christmas

I can't believe Christmas is right around the corner. It came so quick that I wasn't even able to get my cards out. I will be out on Christmas Eve still shopping.

Every year I set out to be finished shopping at least by the beginning of December but that never happens. I have got to get a better plan for next year.

I love Christmas movies I would have to say my top movies that I like are:

Elf
A Christmas Story
Deck the Halls
National Lampoons Christmas
Friday after next

Why Wednesday

Why am I not done Christmas shopping?

Why haven't I sent out cards yet?

Why do I let people hurt my feelings?

Why do people think I want to hear the same thing over and over again?

Why do I not feel like going out this weekend?

Why do I wish I had a man like TI?

Why does Tiny look like Ms. Piggy?

Why can't I wait for a new beginning?

Why do people swear they know everything about you?

Why are some guys punks?

Why can't people just keep it real?

Why do they sugar coat things?

Why do we watch the movie Elf just about everyday in this house?

Why can't people follow through on what they say?

Why do I want to take all of next week off?

Why do I want to push things up to Feb?

Why do I not feel like baking or cooking for Christmas?

Why did this chick who was talking to me breath smell like hot ass?

Why did I want to throw up in her face?

Why do people tell me I look mad when I am not?

Why do people search for something that is not there?

I really love when I sleep and actually wake up fully rested.

I really hate when I let people ruin my day. I have got to work on that. My mother always tells me that I can't control people's actions but I can control how I react to them.

I have made a solid decision to take a mini vacation in Feb. I love when I have something to look forward to, plus it will be a good time to get out of all of this cold weather we will be having then.

They say that people come into your life for a reason but there are a few people I can think of that I wish I never ever met.

T-Baby

It's funny how people may think things are fine but in reality things are messed up.

My sister told me I was brutally honest at times and some people just can't handle that. I don't want to tell people what they want to hear. If you can't handle my personality then don't call me or be around me simple as that.

I notice everything that people do even when I act as if I don't. Sometimes it's not worth putting energy into certain things.

I guess I will never understand someone who wants to ask everything but doesn't want to answer anything. Its a two way street don't expect me to answer you and you can't do the same.

I am far from perfect and I can admit that always.

Don't dish it out if you can't take it.

If you don't know me don't assume shit about me.

I find it annoying when someone try's to tell me what to do. I never will do that since I am not a little kid. Make a suggestion versus telling me. Some may never get it.

K-Ci & JoJo - All My Life

This and That

They say it's getting ready to get cold here. Uggh!!! I am not looking forward to this winter.

I have to go to my oldest son's cross country banquet tonight. Something that I really don't want to go to and neither does he. But hey we will go and make the best of it.

Today I had a conversation with an friend and the question came up. "Can you ever trust someone who has hurt you emotionally? Are you ever able to believe anything they say even if they proclaim to change?" For me I can never fully trust or believe anything that person says if I have been hurt that badly. I mean how can that person expect you to think that they really have changed? Trust is a sacred thing in my opinion and when I trust someone I am putting my heart in their hands.

I am noticing that I work with some real dumb people, everyday I try to figure out how the hell they got a job? Were they once qualified but now they aren't but they have seniority and just kind of do what they have to do to get by? Guess I will never know, I just hope I don't end up like them and stay in the up and up on the latest programs.

Various

When you spend years not being able to be yourself around certain people and then you finally get the courage not to give a fuck about what people think it's amazing how people can't handle it.

I still can't understand how a grown man who has a good job can continue to live in his mother's house.

A lot is changing in my personal life. I am looking forward to it. But I am also nervous. I don't like when things don't go good.

I have lived in this city most of my life and I absolutely hate it.

There are some people who absolutely disgust me. I just want to throw up each and every time I am around them.

Winter is coming and I am not looking forward to driving in the snow. It's pretty to look at but horrible to drive in especially when you have a car and not a truck.

I miss having a truck.

Siblings can really get on your nerves at times. Especially mine. It sucks being the oldest.

I am so ready for this change and nothing anyone says or does can make me think or feel differently.

I am a very sensitive person and I keep my guard up to protect my feelings.

I wish that texting was never invented. It's very impersonal, might as well be talking over instant message.

I like hugs.

I want to go on a cruise sometime next year.

I live each day like it's my last, tomorrow is not promised.

Time for a break

Saturdays

Love me some Saturdays.
No work, nothing to stress me. 
I can sleep a little later than I usually do.
Cartoons on for the kids.
I get to clean my house. 
Talk to friends and Family.
I can even take a nap during the day.
Surf the internet as many times as I want freely.
Play Stevie Wonder while I am cleaning my house.
Wear lounging clothes.  
Lunch dates with my friends.
Drinks in the evenings with friends.
Shopping in the stores.


Quote of the day:  You never forget your first. 

Drake ft. Lil Wayne - The Real Her

Loving this new song from Drake

Drake - Marvins Room (Official Video)

What to do.

Less than two weeks away from my birthday and I am feeling old as hell. I made plans with 2different friends who want to go out for drinks the night before, since I have plans already on the actual day. Problem is I don't really want to go with one so I have to figure out a way to get out of it without hurting anyone's feelings.

Thought of the day:  This "little" waiting game is getting really old!

DAMN!!!!

I save most if not all emails that mean or meant anything to me. Not sure why, maybe to sometime go back and look at what someone wrote to me or to see how foolish I have sounded in an email that I may have sent to someone.

Today I went back and read an email that me and a friend of mine had went back and forth with and I was a little embarrassed of things I wrote and how angry I sounded in the emails. Of course probably at the time I didn't think anything I said was wrong. But now a year later I know that what I said wasn't nice and was completely out of my character.

So if anyone who reads this blog and personally knows me and I have said anything in the past to upset or offend them I am sorry.

Trying to understand

Things that I am still trying to understand

Pay a bill. (oh hell no) I am to independent no thank you....LOL

Why my sister will choose a man based on his car and how he dresses?

Why people think I speak Spanish at work?

Rude ass young people between the age of  (22-26)

Co-workers not having any manners. Don't just but into my conversation cause I will check you on it.

Don't call me and not have anything to say otherwise we will be sitting in silence. LOL 

Why people can't just come out and say what they want rather than beat around the bush.

Why do peps confide in me about something and then change their story?

Things

• I have to stop setting expectations for people.

• I will say this over and over. When someone shows you who they are believe them.

• Stop rushing everything and take a back seat and wait to see what happens.

• Try to put my guard down just a little.

• Walk away and never look back.

• Stop trying to protect everyone's feelings all the time.

• Just do me since tomorrow is not promised.

• If I am not happy then no one is happy.

• Stick to my diet. 

• Keep in touch with old friends.

• Stop worrying so much about things I have no control over.

• Fall back regarding certain people.

• Stop wondering what is it about me that draws people to me.... LOL

• Tell my friends and sisters I am no longer their private investigator.

• I need to be my own investigator on things don't have time for others. LOL  

Kwame - Only You - Throwback Jam of the Day

This was my song back in the day....LOL

Mental Health Day

Today I took a well needed well deserved day off. Oh did I have so many things planned out in my mind that I would get done around the house since I would be alone.

Well that didn't happen...the minute I dropped off Angie and made a stop at BK I walked back into the house, put on a show and it was game over for me. I watched a lot of talk shows relaxed and relaxed some more. Finally got up to wash clothes and drop something off at the school. Only to come back home and lay down for 2.2 more seconds and then jump up do a quick cleaning of the living room and leave back out to go pick up the kids.

So much for a productive day but in the end it was all worth me staying home and just being in chill mode.

Question of the day: Can you fall in love with someone's words but not the actual person?

Method Man feat Mary J Blige - All I Need uncut

I love this song

Method Man, D'Angelo - Break Ups 2 Make Ups

This and That

I have tints on my car. I wouldn't have it any other way. The front windows are as dark as I could get them for the legal limit. The back are just about limousine tint dark. I love it because nothing annoys me more when people can see right in my car or who's in my car.

When I am in someone's car that doesn't have tints I feel as if I am in a fish bowl. LOL. NO I don't have anything to hide but I think it's a good look on your car no matter what type of car you have to get tints and make sure it's a good job not just someone on the street putting them on. LOL

Tomorrow is Friday and I am so glad. I am still trying to figure out what I am doing for my birthday. I can't wait.

This is a busy month for me. Each weekend I have something going on. The next two weekends I will be making a trip first to upstate NY and then to the City the following weekend. When will I get a weekend to just chill. I am not complaining either because at least I will have something to do.

I am on the look out for a perfect pair of boots for the fall. I have saw tons but still haven't found "That One"