Very Interesting....

The Case of Ota Benga

In 1906 the crowds thronged the monkey house exhibit at the Bronx Zoo (New York Zoological Park). Here were man's "evolutionary ancestors" - monkeys, chimpanzees, a gorilla named Dinah, an orangutan named Dohung and an African pygmy tribesman named Ota Benga.
Ota Benga was brought from the Belgian Congo in 1904 by noted African explorer Samuel Verner along with other pygmies and displayed in an exhibit in the 1904 St. Louis world's Fair. Ota Benga (or "Bi", which means "friend" in his language) was born in 1881, had a height of 4 ft. 11in. and weighted 103 lbs. Although he was referred to as a boy he had been married twice. His first wife had been captured by a hostile tribe and his second wife died by a snake bite.
After the St. Louis exhibit, Ota found himself at the Bronx Zoo which at that time was under the direction of Dr. William T. Hornaday, who was considered a bit eccentric. Hornaday believed animals had nearly human thoughts and personalities, and he could read the thoughts of zoo animals. He "apparently saw no difference between a wild beast and the little Black man" and insisted he was only offering an "intriguing exhibit". (Jerry Bergman, Creation Ex Nihilo, Vol 16, No 1 Dec 1993-Feb 1994 p. 49, quoting Carl Sifakis, "Benga, Ota: The Zoo Man", in American Eccentrics, Facts on File, New York, 1984, p. 253)
The exhibit was immensely popular and controversial; the black community was outraged and some churchmen feared that it would convince people of Darwin's theory of evolution. Under threat of legal action, Hornaday had Ota Benga leave his cage and circulate around the zoo in a white suit, but he returned to the monkey house to sleep.
In time Ota Benga began to hate being the object of curiosity. "There were 40,000 visitors to the part on Sunday. Nearly every man, woman and child of this crowd made for the monkey house to see the start attraction in the park - the wild man from Africa. They chased him about the grounds add day, howling, jeering, and yelling. Some of them poked him in the ribs, others tripped him up, all laughed at him." (Creation Ex Nihilo, quoting Phillip V. Bradford and Harvey Blume, "Ota Benga: The Pygmy in the Zoo", St. Martins, 1992, p. 269, from the "New York Times" Sept. 18, 1906) At one point, he got hold of a knife and flourished it around the park, another time he produced a fracas after being denied a soda from the soda fountain. Finally, after fabricating a small bow and arrows and shooting at obnoxious park visitors he had to leave the park for good.

After his park experience, several institutions tried to help him. He was placed in Virginia Theological Seminary and College but quit school to work in a tobacco factory. According to Hornaday (who probably had evolutionary racist views) "he did not possess the power of learning" (Creation Ex Nihilo, Vol 16, No. 1 Dec. 1993-Feb 1994, pp. 48-50).
Growing homesick, hostile, and despondent Ota Benga borrowed a revolver, and shot himself in the heart, ending his life in 1916.

Lately I have been a little short with people, the kids, just everyone....I guess that I am just really getting tired of all of everyone's bull shit. You know it gets tiring after a while, people with their same ol stuff day in and day out. And it seems as if it is all being dumped on me. And while I try to be a team player, I just can't anymore. My home life has some curve balls in it that need to be attended to....and for me that is extremely important....It's time for me to do me and my family at home.

Life is to short for people to not know what they really want out of life...If you truly know what you want, then do it stop waiting because no one is promised tomorrow. And if you want to get something off of your chest, But are afraid of hurting someone's feelings, it's better if you just say it and get it over with. You can't make everyone happy....Also, you can't spend your life dwelling on the past and things that happened before because you surely can't go back to yesterday so leave it as yesterday and focus on today. All you can do is go forward.

Things

There are certain people's blog pages that I visit frequently and others that I don't. One thing that I have noticed lately is that the pages that I do visit once in a while the things that people say or comments that have been made on their pages by other people are very enlightening.

Anyways....
Life has been cool except for the occasional situations that happen with other people. For instance EI* is a social worker and gets a fucked up message from one of her clients on her voicemail on Friday. Now EI* is all pissed over it, which I understand. But now it is Monday and EI* is still bitching over this same message. So I say to EI* "Look get over it because you have no control over what people say to you, but also you can't let it ruin your entire weekend and now the beginning of your week." I can tell by the tone in EI*'s voice that she is like whatever. Oh well you can't please everyone.

family vacations

So i don't know if you remember my post a while back, but I mentioned that I was going to Florida to see my moms and it was turning into a fiasco.
Now....
I'm back and I have to say this Never Ever Ever Ever will I subject my self and my kids to a fucking ride in MY car with my Aunt. What a fucking joke.

Shit to make a long story short, She only paid for $80 worth of gas the entire time. This is Round trip and most of you know how expensive gas has gotten and think about driving a SUV about 1,200 + miles each way!

Then she had to be reminded that she would not try to punk me or make me out to be the bad one when clearly she was lying about her rental car situation when we got there. UGGGh....

It was so hot and humid there but otherwise aside of the family arguement and other bullshit. The trip was ok. Plus I got to see my mom. We went to the beach a couple of times and swam in the pool the other days, so that was cool. Oh yea we went to Sea World where none of my kids wanted to go and I didn't either, but I had to be a team player so I went.

Oh yea, one thing that was so funny was when I was in Burger King and this guy comes in with no damn shoes on just bare ass feet like it was nothing smiling and shit. Doesn't he know he looked like a damn fool. Also when I was standing in line behind about 3 other women and another comes along and says to me "They only got one seat in there?" I almost died with laughter. It was the way she sounded. LOL>..

I'm sitting here with you. I know that you are talking to me but I can't even comprehend what you are actually saying. I am just trying to fight back the tears that I can feel coming. WFT I am thinking that I need to be stronger. I can't let you see me cry. I try to change the conversation by telling you that we need to close the windows cause it's raining. But you instantly keep on telling me that I am special to you and always will be. Fuck it that's not good enough for me. My selfish ways are wishing that you would just say fuck it I am not leaving. But that's just a hope and a wish and of course that's not reality. I told you before it's a piece of my heart that's being ripped away.

Hot on a Sunday afternoon.

Happy Father's Day to all of the dads who are out there doing right.

I was talking to a friend the other day and I have come to the conclusion that I must be getting old or something. I mean she was talking about a lot of things that I had no idea what it was. Shit we even spoke about how long it has been since I have had a drink. LOL....
I got to thinking later and maybe it is just me growing changing .....

Oh it is 91 degrees right this moment and I am hot as fuck. This is too much for me. I feel like all I can do today is sleep. I can't even function. This heat has me all annoyed.

Work is tomorrow and if it is this hot tomorrow I am going to have a fucked up day. I really wish I had just got in my car today and went to the beach.

Jealous/Envy

Why do you Envy me?
Damn this little game that we keep playing is getting really annoying.
I see the jealously in your eyes when I tell you about the happiness in my life.
Damn girl get a fucking life.....

Does it bother you when you see they way your man looks at me when I am around?
Don't you just hate that I am doing something with my life and you are in the same position that you were in last year.
That's your fault....

Enough of all of this jealousy grow the fuck up and do you cause I am definitely doing me.

So finallly there is some nice weather headed our way. It's about damn time.
I am a little annoyed that I haven't set up my pc at home. Now *T's computer is set up in his room but I just haven't found the time to set up mine.

This was an ok weekend I definitely can't complain especially when you are in a happy home. LOL...

The last day of school is next Tuesday so the kids summer vacation is almost here. in 5 weeks we will be yet again trying to attempt on our trip to FL.

On another note. Someone please tell me how the hell are you going to charge $25.00 to take out one bag of trash.

What If's

What if we hated eachother?
What if we weren't just friends
What if we did have that real date?
Would we have made it?
Would it have worked?
Would you be happy?
Would I be happy?
What if we had a baby?
Would we care what people thought?
What if we never met?
Would our paths have ever crossed?
Would I think that you were "the one"?
What if I told you I loved you?
Would you have told me back?

Problems

What a day....

Today I felt as if I was everyone's counselor. After listing and hearing everyone's problems, I realize that my problems that I have could be a lot worse. I may live paycheck to paycheck most of the time but, a least I am not dealing with the type of shit that I heard from two different individuals today who are not struggling like me but have hang ups in different situations.

Well tomorrow is payday!!! I am so glad cause this move has drained me completely. I am still settling in and still have a few more boxes to unpack.

Finally we are done with the move. I tell you this past weekend was so extremely tiring. I am glad that that part is over with. Now we are in the process of unpacking and I am starting to find that I brought shit that I won't even use. WTF....

I am about sick of this damn rain here. Someone please tell me when it will be over.

Have you ever wanted to just tell someone that you feel that their choices are just plain ol' stupid. That you think they are a complete fuck up!

You have right.

Well that is how I am feeling and I am seriously debating telling someone this. I have been a major bitch lately and I guess that this is contributed to things going on with people in my inner circle that are upsetting me.

I need to just let it go. But honestly it is hard sometimes.

*K..... I will explain this to you.

Memorial Day

I have finally gotten excited about our little mini get away this weekend. I guess since the weather man is predicting highs near 90 I am all excited. We leave tomorrow morning and come back Monday afternoon.

I was thinking the other day how times have changed. I remember when Memorial Day was the big cookout day with my family. Now, no one even bothers to have one. Hmmmm....

Enjoy your weekend, I know I will.!!!!

The Letter

Dear *You*:

I am sorry but I can't do this with you anymore. I am tired of being your chick on the side. I deserve better than this. No we absolutely can not be friends anymore. I don't need to see you or talk to you again. Let's just put it as if we never met each other. Obviously you never had any intentions of leaving her because no matter how bad you say your relationship with her is. The fact remains YOU ARE STILL WITH HER! Well it was nice knowing you. FUCKER

Randoms

Rain Rain and More Rain. I am so sick of this rain it's not even funny. It has been raining for so many dates that I can not even remember how many. Then yesterday the sun is out just to tease us and now back to this shit. What even pisses me off more is that I have bad hair days with all this rain. Fuck!!!

Anyhow....*T's birthday is tomorrow so that will be nice.

I am so in need of a vacation that I wish I could take one right this moment. Once again I am re-evaluating the people around me. It's time to close another chapter in my life. Time to really be around people who have positive things going for them and people who know what they want and actually don't just talk about it but do it.

I am starting to have absolutely no patience what so ever for certain individuals who are unhappy with their life choices and talk about the shit everyday but aren't doing a damn thing to change it.

So with that said. Have a great weekend!!!

The Move

Well we are moving at the end of the month. I am excited but also stressed at the same time. I hate packing. I truly wish that I could just have someone pack my stuff for me. Then there's the stress on the actual move day. The last time we moved it sucked. The entire day was so damn draining. Then the unpack. I think that I will take an entire day off of work just to unpack. Because it is virtually impossible to unpack everything in one day if you work. There is no way I know that I could do that with having to come home and take care of the kids. We are going on a mini vacation for Memorial Day weekend and then come home to move. Maybe I will get a little relaxation over those few days away..... Oh well it's a never ending story.

Happy Mother's Day!!!

School trips and bad breath

Today I went on a school trip to an art museum with Whit. As I was sitting on the school bus and the kids were loud as shit with all of their talking and signing, I was thinking to my self there is no fucking way that I could be a teacher and deal with this every single day. Damn, those kids were a hand full. They wore me out and I was only with them for 2 1/2 hours. I wonder if parents thought the same about my class when I was younger and they chaperoned on the school trips. LOL..

The weather was nice and I was in a good mood. That is until after the trip I went back to work. Me and a couple of my co-workers are trying to figure out how to tell another co-worker that her breath smells like shit. But see no mater how you tell someone something like that it will hurt their feelings. But dam this chick is one of those people that come right in your face. All invading your space. I am not as nice as my other co-workers, shit I come quick with the bitch attitude and it is usually very obvious I am extremely particular on who I want coming all up in my face. If I am not fucking you then back the fuck off.

Now come to think of it, I wonder if this chick takes a shower/bath everyday, cause chick smells a little like hot bologna. LOL.....

Well we will attempt our trip to FL again in July. Hopefully we will make it there this time.

This weekend was a nice one. I went to a surprise b'day party for my friend and Whit. had a friend sleep over. I have to say that I need her to have more friends sleep over. I didn't have to talk to her once. They were so silly playing dress up. One would have on a ballerina outfit and the other would have on a cat outfit. Then all of a sudden they would switch. LOL....I will have to post the pictures soon.

Today it is going to be so nice out. I am sporting my spring gear today. I can not wait until the weather is consistently nice out.

NO I 'm not dead. I just have been crazy busy over the past few weeks.

New car.....

Yes a girl is moving up. I have a brand new car and I am damn proud of myself. My old car was almost 10 years old and starting to give me little problems. Check out my new one....

Cute huh????? I love it.

Anyhow...I know it's Spring but over the past few days you would hardly know it.

K I know this is kinda late but...it was so nice to see you.

Oh my brother is coming up here next week. That should be interesting since every conversation that we have is him telling me he's grown. LMAO....

Hump Day

Today is Wednesday and another day closer to the weekend. I am so glad that Spring is here even though it doesn't feel like Spring yet.